They need better writers

I found the following in my gmail spam about fifteen minutes ago:
PAYMENT ACCOUNT ALERT
    x
IRS OFFICE <irsoffice1@globomail.com>
    
20:34 (0 minutes ago)
        
to undisclosed recipients

Internal Revenue and Deputy Commissioner for Services and Enforcement
 
 
Sir/Madam
 
This is an official advice from the Acting Commissioner of Internal Revenue and Deputy Commissioner for Services and Enforcement (Mr. Steven T. Miller). It has come to our notice that the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) has approved and released the sum of $1.5, 000,000.00 U.S dollars into a Bank in USA and in your name as the beneficiary by Inheritance means and as reward for default in the release of funds you are expecting from The Nigerian Government ,And the bank of Nigeria knowing full well that they do not have enough facilities to effect this payment from their Bank to your account used what we know as a Secret Diplomatic Transit Payment (S.T.D.P) to pay this fund through wire transfer.
 
But after the investigation on this fund, the attention Reaching Our Department from the Presidential Office in Abuja Nigeria Revealed that Such Transfer was made into The United States Bank as The officials handling this transfer has been Plotting on How to Divert The Funds into a Secret Account . But The UNITED STATES FINANCIAL CRIMES DIVISION (USFD) and THE FEDERAL BUREAU ON INVESTIGATION (F B I) has arrested Most of them and they are under the custody of Nigerian Authorities. The Reports Reaching Our Intelligence Department has declared that you are the original beneficiary to this amount then we have to carry out our investigation to know if they are telling us the fact because we believe that Nigerians are full of scams cheaters.
 
Now your fund is no longer in Nigeria rather its in a Bank accordingly to the Custody of the Internal Revenue and Deputy Commissioner for Services and Enforcement. You have to contact us immediately so that we Can direct you on how to receive your fund from the Bank. Now that you have been in communication with Our Office, you dont have any more problems hence the imposters in Nigeria are behind the bar but You are required to present a classified FUND ONWERSHIP PERMIT to be issued in your favor by The UNITED STATES FINANCIAL CRIMES DIVISION (USFD) so that of the Internal Revenue and Deputy Commissioner for Services and Enforcement can execute the payment order of $1.5, 000,000.00 U.S dollars to your favor.
 
You are also expected to Re-confirm This Office with the below Information Immediately; Your Full name…………..Address……………… Email address…… Country……..Telephone number………………
 
Thank you
 
Mr. Steven T. Miller 59.50.102.171
Acting Commissioner of Internal Revenue and Deputy Commissioner for Services and Enforcement

Where do I begin?  Well, beyond the obvious sign “to undisclosed recipients”, there are many telltales that this is not a legitimate message.  Another good clue is that although this purports to be from the IRS, it wasn’t sent from a US government email.

The English is quite frankly atrocious.  There is no possible way any government agency anywhere in the English speaking world would hire someone with such poor language skills.   The most honest statement, which you wouldn’t find in any legitimate correspondence, is “we believe that Nigerians are full of scams cheaters”.

If you get an email like this, laugh at it, then delete it.  If you do let your greed get the better of you and actually give them the information they seek, you’ve only yourself to blame.

Cat.

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